What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Is there any program to remove music from affirmations (if you listen to subliminals you know that affirmations are masked with music so I want to remove this music to find out the affirmations)?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Please, Please, Please Don't Show This To Your MAGA-Supporting Family Unless You Want To Start A Fight At The Dinner Table - Yahoo News

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Google adds AI features to Chromebook Plus devices - TechCrunch

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Police arrest roughly 60 protesters outside US Capitol - CNN

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Astronomers Astonished by Largest Explosion Since the Big Bang - futurism.com

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Make Nazis afraid again!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Red Dead Redemption's John Marston Actor Teases "Exciting News" Coming Soon - GameSpot

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

How does Google Gemini 2.0 work?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

TEXT:

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

NASA Mars Orbiter Captures Volcano Peeking Above Morning Cloud Tops - NASA (.gov)

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What did your sister do to you that you can never forget?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Can Benadryl cause a false positive for benzodiazepines?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Can you explain the difference between a detox center and an addiction treatment center? Are they interchangeable terms?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!